He has no idea what he's missing

Last night my husband said to me, something along the lines of, "Did you know the prices of tickets to Disney World are going up? It's one hundred dollars just for one day! Did you know that? We are never going to Disney World. That is ridiculous."

I just looked at him and smirked.

"Are you insane?" he asked.

I said, "You have NO idea! It is the most amazing thing! Seriously, it's...amazing."

"It's hot and sticky and there's a million people!"

"We go in the fall when it's not a million degrees and there aren't a million people and the lines are shorter. And it's not for you, it's for them"

He just rolled his eyes at me and sighed his usual, the-woman-I-married-is-completely-out-of-her-mind look for probably the tenth time that day.

My husband has never been to Disney World. My family has gone almost every other year from the time I was 6 until I was 20.

I really believe he has no idea what he's missing. Not only do I think he would LOVE it, I was completely right when I said it wasn't for him, it's for our girls. The joy a parent gets from seeing their child having fun is incredible. BOTH our girls would absolutely love a trip to Disney World and it WILL happen.

I went back to a photo album I had and found our first trip to Disney World. Even at age 6 there are still so many parts of this trip (and all our Disney trips) that I remember. So thankful we were able to go...and go again, and again, and again.... 

On the Trolley with Mom (Nice hairdo, mom)

Nicole, Ben, Me

Dad, Mickey, Ben, Me, Nicole

Okay, so maybe just a little bit of our trip was like this here ;) Just don't tell my husband!

A conversation with myself...

(Note: At any point in time I am both of these people! But aren't we all?)

It's March. 

Really?

Yeeeeeeea.

You have GOT to be kidding me. It is 29 degrees outside.

It is definitely March. "In like a lion," right?

Yea, in like a lion, not "in like a rabid wolverine!"

It's not that bad. How can you appreciate the sun without the rain? How can you appreciate the light without the dark? How can you appreciate the spring without the winter?

I'm pretty sure I can appreciate them all just fine. How my ancestors decided the Midwest was the place to move and stay is beyond me! And now we're stuck here. 

You COULD just move to a warmer state, or even another country.

Let's get real, unless my entire extended family is moving, we're not going anywhere. So now my children are doomed to the same fate as I; a life of cold weather for more months than there is warmth. AND my birthday is in March. Right in the middle. So I was never able to plan for an outside birthday party! I love being outside. And all my friends had birthdays in nice months so they had party activities outside. And now my daughter has a March birthday and I've willingly cursed her with never being able to really PLAN a party outside.

Sounds like you've got some real problems there.

You don't even know. You Don't. Even. Know.

You do realize that spring WILL come, right? Like it WILL eventually get warmer outside.

Not soon enough...

Thank God for Pee on the Floor

After a rough evening for my toddler (just one of those cry about nothing nights) it was time for bed. Right before bedtime she had a huge accident. She has been in underwear for 2 1/2 months now but we still have an accident every once in a while - which is understandable because she won't even be 2 for another week and a half.

Those uncommon accidents are usually a sprinkle, followed by a run and a scream of "Mallowy go potty!" as she bolts to the bathroom where she finishes in the appropriate place. Last night it was a large puddle, at my feet, as I was trying to defrost some milk for her sister. Needless to say, I was not thrilled.

After 10 minutes of cleaning the floor, wiping her down, pouring a bottle and handing it to my husband, I grabbed my now naked toddler and ran her upstairs. I quickly soaped her down in the tub and then let her choose her pajamas.

I was ready to sing one song and get back downstairs to finish cleaning up, take care of the dishes and run a load of diapers in the washer.

Mallory wanted a book and I reluctantly said "Okay" as she picked one out. The book she chose was titled, "Daddy Loves Me."

Really, Mallory? Did Daddy clean up your lake of pee, or give you the quickie bath, or put you to bed tonight? And this is the book you want? - I didn't actually say that to her, I just crawled into her bed with her and started reading as I rolled my eyes on the inside.

We read that book 5 times. I read it first, then she read the words "Daddy" and "me" that appeared on each page while I read the others (Daddy plays with me. Daddy cooks for me). Then we mixed it up while I read a page she would "read" the next (she knows what some of the pages say by now). After each reading she would say "One more time. Lets read one more time." while she nodded her head and opened it again - this is almost impossible to resist. So, I happily obliged and we read on.

If she hadn't peed next to me and had I not been the one to clean her up and bring her upstairs to change her into pajamas I would have missed out on reading with her.

Missed out on cuddling with her in her big girl bed.

Missed out on tucking her...and puppy...and giraffe...and little puppy...and owl blanket...and Walter, into bed.

Missed out on most likely her happiest moment of the day, and mine as well.
(She was a hot mess when I left in the morning, as she is starting to realize that I am going to leave her every day now, and the sitter said she seemed lost and was wrapped in her blanket all day - I know. So sad!)

I think we both needed that time together after my first two weeks back at work. I don't think I realized it until after I finally said goodnight.

I'm thankful today that God thought "Hey, they need some quiet time together, just the two of them. I know, I think I'll drain her little bladder right about............................now."

At least in my mind that's how it happened :)

The Power of a Day in Jeans...

I love Fridays.

I am going to tell you why, and if you work (closely) with me you should already know what I am going to say...

Jeans! Jeans! JEANS!

I am most comfortable in jeans. I think that this is a lot because of my weight and deflated body after having 2 kids in under 2 years and that I don't own any dress pants that fit correctly right now (but I am in between sizes). I also wear a lot of hooded sweatshirts and they hide a lot! But even on a warm day, in a flowy tank and cardigan at work, if it is paired with jeans...the world is a better place.

It's sad to say, but I think I teach better in jeans.

I am very self-conscious the other 4 days of the week, while in dress pants and a nice top - I just don't feel comfortable - and on Friday, or any jeans day, I am more relaxed...and I don't have to try on a million outfits because every color top goes perfectly with my jeans. Those jeans that make me look skinnier - and a sweatshirt that covers it all - make me so much happier!

And when you're happier you seem to work better....more efficiently....and it can often rub off on those you work with - coworkers and students alike.

So I am going to have a GREAT day because I will be in jeans!



...and since it's freezing in my room I'll be warm in my sweatshirt! No need for a scarf and jacket all day! That makes me even happier. :)

Pseudo Friendships (The Wonder of Facebook)

I have 199 friends.

That is, if you checked my Facebook account today.

I haven't called most of them....ever. And I haven't emailed or messaged them in a long long time. Some of them are friends from high school, some from college, some relatives, some acquaintances, and some are people I actually, physically, hang out with regularly!

I love the idea of Facebook and use it regularly but there are positives and negatives to this social media phenomenon.

Here is my list of reasons why I like Facebook (FB):

1. You can keep up with people you used to spend time with and see what's going on in their lives with little to no effort at all. I like knowing about the new baby, the job change, and my  favorite college professors' Saturday plans. Maybe FB has conditioned me to find this interesting, but either way, I like it.

2. You get to interact with people with which you wouldn't normally get to interact. This could be for various reasons; distance, schedules, the fact that you only met them twice because they used to date your 3rd cousin - but now, you have an awesome online friendship! We "like" the photos of each others' kids, comment on posts, give advice when needed, etc. and it's great for that!

3. It gives a sense of connectedness to people when sometimes you are lacking that in your daily life. There are days when you feel like no one is "getting" you, or something great, or awful, has happened an no one is around to tell. Well, problem solved! Write a status and tell your Facebook friends and you'll have people congratulating you, giving advice and encouragement within the hour!

4. Mom crap (or just mundane life crap). As stated in one of my previous posts, I love mom crap. And I love talking about my kids and parenting in general. However, I know that the same four people I spend all day every day with do NOT want to talk about mom crap nearly as much as I totally could. On Facebook, a large number of my "friends" are moms, or are about to become moms. So, if I want to post another picture of my kids or a story about them for the third time today, I will get 12 "likes" and 5 comments and maybe even a message with some other mom's similar story... and I will think, "Yes, they get it!" because you know what? I am going to like their photos and stories too.

Now, reasons why Facebook bothers me sometimes:

1. You can keep up with people you used to spend time with and see what's going on in their lives with little to no effort at all! I don't have to call anyone or schedule a time to get together to find out what's going on. While this was one reason I love Facebook, it is also one of the reasons I hate it sometimes. I SHOULD get together with old friends to catch up. However, this is quite the Catch 22 here: if FB didn't exist, I would probably never communicate with some people I used to hang out with all the time, but are now far away, and so, I would never think to call them up, on a number I don't have, and schedule time to see them.

2. Its misuses by kids (who shouldn't be on it anyway), teens, and young adults. All I have to say is:
No, you should NOT post another picture of your 19-year old self, in a bikini, drinking from a bottle of Jack, as you ride your bike into a pool of Jello, titled "YOLO."

And let's not forget the cyber-bullying that is running rampant in this country. Such an awful use for something that has such great potential to be good.

3. Two words...time suck. I'll admit, I get sucked in to posting things, commenting on posts and photos, liking things, and feeling like I need to see all of my news feed up until I hit posts I've already seen. FB can suck your life away, so be careful. Make a vow with yourself only to check it at certain times...maybe lunch and after the kids are asleep (or when you get home and they're napping) - said the woman who is finishing this post while feeding one kid and watching the other play next to her. I really AM fairly good at limiting my screen time, but I wanted this done before dinner :)


I must say, though, the positives of using Facebook, for me, outweigh the negatives and I will continue to use FB to keep up with and communicate with all those people I have chosen not to "unfriend" thus far.

Note: It's a great idea to sort through your friends and get rid of / unfriend ones you don't actually want to know about or talk to - and I don't mean that in the same way a 7th grade girl might ("OMG, Becky, I am SO unfriending her when I get home!"). I just mean that I would rather have 200 friends and relatives whose stories I actually care about or who I know I might need to get a hold of at some point, then keeping a huge list of friends who probably don't want to see my posts anyway.

What are your thoughts on Facebook? Amazing communication tool? Or huge social mistake?

Mallory and the Bear

We have a snow day today! So, we started our day like every other snow day - with Daddy making pancakes. Mallory and I sat down at the table while we waited for our pancakes to arrive on our plates. What I am about to share here has happened twice before in the past week....and we don't live in bear country. Having happened before, I grabbed a pen and paper to keep track of our conversation.

Note to readers: Imagine everything Mallory says with toddler speak (ie: drinking = dwinking)...it's more entertaining that way :)

M: Bear!

Me: You see the bear?

M: Yea. Bear drink water. 
    See? All gone!
    Look behind you.

(I look out the window - at nothing, obviously)

Me: What's the bear doing?

M: He's drinking water.

Me: Is he by himself?

M: Yea 
(looks out window)
    Where's bear go?
    I missed it!
    Oh no.

Me: You want to go pet the bear?

M: (scared look on her face) No.
    Marin pet the bear.

Me: You want Marin to go pet the bear? Okay.

M: Nooooooo. Mallory pet the bear. I pet the bear.

Me: What color is the bear?

M: Brown.
(looks out window again)
     I see him eat her!

Me: What is the bear eating!?

M: Bear is eating the treats. (as in dog treats)
     Oh no!
     What's bear doing!?
     We missed it!
(pause)
    Go pet the bear.

Me: You want to? Let's go!

M: Noooo!

Me: What happens when you pet the bear?

M: You get owie.

And then the pancakes came...

M: OooooOOooooh! Dip!: 

Oh, how I love snow days...

...and pancakes.

....and toddlers.

.....and that bear for giving us this story.

Change

I love and hate change. Change can be awesome and inspiring and a motivator, and it can also be really hard to deal with.

I have been back at work for a week now. I have never been shy about "telling it like it is" when it comes to my feelings about going back to work after having kids and when asked this is my standard response: I love what I do, but there are two little things at home I love more.

I am sure that there are a zillion moms in the world who feel the same way. I have a few friends who aren't afraid to admit that they need a job; something to do and accomplish outside the home...something that helps them to appreciate their time with that screaming toddler.

I, on the other hand, would love to be a stay-at-home mom. I love mom crap: cloth diapers, making our own baby food, keeping a clean(er) house, crafting (see my post "A Very Pinterest Christmas"), themed birthday parties that take a few weeks to plan. I love it all. I still try to do these things but it is a lot more stressful trying to do it all while working every day. I loved my time at home with my girls but now I'm back at work.

What.....a.....change. Work is going well so far. I moved my desk around - great change! My sub moved the desks from groups to rows - weird for me, not sure if it's good or bad change. I miss my girls a LOT - bad. But I am in such a great mood on the afternoons when I get home to see them - good. My sitter just texted me a picture of them - good to see them at this moment, bad that I'm not there. The house is neglected - bad. But since the dogs aren't running around the house all day (they are caged when the sitter is there) there isn't nearly as much dog hair around which means less vacuuming- fantastic change!

On my first day back, I was working in my room and took a break to do some reading. It was a book I downloaded about stress control and time management for teachers - something I desperately needed on day one. In the first chapter there was a quote,

"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude." ~Maya Angelou

Whoa.

If you know me I can be a lot more negative and critical than I'd like to admit. And I don't want to be too exaggerated here, but reading that has really changed my perspective on things; possibly on my entire life.

I cannot change the fact that I have to work while my kids are tiny. Well....I could, actually. My husband says "three words...For. Sale. Sign.," but we spent too much time and effort building our house through the trades program and it's what we want our kids to grow up in and when they are all in school (and much bigger) we'll need the space. So...I have decided that my husband's solution is not a real one for us, just so I can have a few years at home with my babies.

SO...I am changing my attitude. My kids are wonderful and so happy, and I know they feel loved and that is what is most important.

OBVIOUSLY, these kids are happy :)

I am lucky to have a job...and a job I actually enjoy, so I am going to go back to enjoying my job, FULLY. I have always known I wanted to be a teacher, and I LOVE teaching...I just always thought that when I had kids I would get to stay home for a while with them and then go back to teaching later. Letting go of that has been a big change for me because I have been holding on to that hope for a long time now. And yes, I miss my girls terribly, but since I can't change my situation, I am changing my attitude about it.

Look on the bright side.
Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative.
Let it be.
Turn lemons into lemonade.
Let go, and let God.

Since that moment, when I decided to change my attitude, I feel refreshed and have a renewed energy when it comes to my teaching.

I am vowing to be present, as best as I can, both at home and at school, and not wallow in my sadness, and feel sorry for myself about not being with my girls all day.

I am a great mom. I need to tell myself that more often (and I think we all do!). There will be more changes in our future, bad and good, I will try to keep positive, and remember that I am a great mom (even when I feel otherwise). I am a great mom.

And, to (embarrassingly) quote a Justin Beiber song,..."The grass ain't always greener on the other side, it's green where you water it." Instead of dreaming of what could have been, I am going to put my efforts into what IS and have the greenest lawns EVER. :)

Gonna go water one of my lawns now...a.k.a. get my oldest up from her nap and do some dancing!

And tomorrow I will go back to watering my other "sprouts" as they head into day two of ISTEP!

Slice of Life

Jumping on the bandwagon a little late here, but still excited to join the Slice of Life Challenge! So, to start I am going to give a small "slice of  life" with my almost 2 year old...

Yea...that one. She. is. a. HOOT!

There are so many days when I think "what a ding-dong." She can be so silly as she dances to the sink to wash up after a meal, or singing her ABC's, or telling Daddy not to eat her pancake (just this morning). Since she was very tiny we knew she was hilarious (see above). As I type this she is wandering around the living room with her blanket over her head, holding "Walter" the stuffed dog licking his nose. 

But she is also so incredibly smart. She knows a lot of shapes, all of her capital letters and most of the lowercase, loves to read, she can count items up to ten, can talk in 5+ word sentences, and is daytime potty-trained (still diapers during naps and bedtime). Not intentionally tooting my/her horn here but I am just so proud of her! It's wonderful, especially as a teacher, to know that my child shares in my love of learning at such an early age.

I am sure I will have some good stories about her to tell in the month to come so watch out!

P.S. She just started pulling out her "shapes" (K'Nex made into 2D and 3D shapes by Daddy), grabbed one and said "twapazoid pwism." Did I mention both her parents and grandmother are Math teachers? Next step: Calculus! :)